The Heroic Explorer
by Grass Furr
Summary: Dora the Explorer, a mighty superhero, is tasked with defeating the most sinister mastermind of all... Dark Lord Swiper. Aided in her quest by an unfortunate sidekick and a sad little duckling, Dora seeks to overthrow the dark ruler to free the citizens of Swiperville and simultaneously avenge herself of past anger.


**Author's Note:** Hi, this is my very first story, which is meant entirely for comedic purposes. I have already begun Chapter 2, though I am currently uncertain when I will be publishing it. I hope you enjoy this story, as I put quite a bit of time into it! :) Thank you for any and all support!

* * *

It was a seemingly ordinary day in Swiperville. Towns bustled in melancholy activity, citizens walked up and down the cobbled pavement, and most animals pretended to be unable to speak English… and Spanish.

Within a large, dark building in the center of town, resided a cloaked figure, who leaned back in a stereotypical, villainous-looking chair. His face was inhuman, and his demeanor astoundingly terrifying. It was as if he were a hybrid between a human and a beast, a creature so horrible… no one was horrified of it at all. He was an anthropomorphic vulpine.

A highly ugly anthropomorphic vulpine, with a weaselly snout and a hideous complexion.

The embodiment of terror itself.

"Now, my subjects…" He said in a nasally voice, "Who is a mere bandit again, defeated by the power of chanting a simple phrase three times?"

The phrase still echoed in his ears, like a fading nightmare.

"Fade away, you foolish phrase…" He laughed, "You have no effect on me anymore!"

While chuckling, he stroked the fur of a black cat he held on his lap. It purred and laughed with him in a stereotypically villainous maniacality.

* * *

Meanwhile, in a forest near Swiperville, a group of fluffy ducklings listened to legends told by their elders.

"Listen, dear duckling children…" The elders spoke quietly, "You are endowed with power greater than you will ever know. You are descendants of the great King Quack, who fought bravely for all Waddling-Bird kind…"

One duckling, sporting bucked teeth and messy, grey feathers spoke up from the back, "Does that include penguins?"

The other ducklings turned and stared at him. They shivered in disgust upon seeing him.

Sighing, the elder looked the ugly duckling in the eye, "Yes, penguins are included, Alfred…"

Alfred smiled. He was happy that penguins were included. Penguins were cute and fluffy, which he longed to be. And they were outcasts, just like him, since they were one of the few flightless birds.

"I love penguins." He said in a dopey voice matching his dopey grin.

Everyone else rolled their eyes and turned their attention away from him. No one liked Alfred. He was weird, ugly, and smelled like tomatoes.

"You are all destined for greatness…" The elder quack continued, "To rid the world of the rising evil, and free all Waddling-Birds once again."

"What rising evil?" One duckling asked fearfully.

The elder bowed his head, "You have heard what has overtaken the world of the anthropomorphic, have you not?"

"Of the humans, you mean?"

"Mostly, yes."

"Um… I'm not sure."

"They are being ruled by a malicious ruler, who lives in Swiperville. They do not understand the influence of his dark power yet, but soon they will… Soon everything will change. And this is why we must overtake the humans ourselves."

"Wait, you mean _we _are supposed to rule the humans?" The duckling ventured.

"Yes, my good child. This is the lot of the Quacks in life. Our job is to make life more difficult for everyone else, as a true quack should."

Alfred piped up, "But doesn't that make us no better than the villain ruling over them right now?"

The elder snapped at him, "Alfred, you are far too vain. You must realize the difference, yes?"

Alfred tilted his head quizzically, "...No?"

"We are kind, gentle animals! We would never lord over our subjects in such a manner as this current ruler. Don't you understand that, boy?"

Alfred watched him for several moments, then frowned. No, he did not understand. But he seldom understood the ways of his fellow quacklings. He truly was an outcast.

* * *

Later that day, as Alfred waddled home from their meeting, he saw a group of ducklings ahead who appeared to be playing some kind of game.

Waddling more quickly, he made his way toward them with an excited look on his face, hoping to join in.

"Oh crap…" One of the ducklings stated, "Here comes weird Al…"

"Hi guys!" Alfred shouted, stopping clumsily next to them.

They pretended not to hear him.

Drawing in a deep breath, he shouted again, "HI EVERYONE!"

"Al, don't you have somewhere to be?"

Alfred stared at them in confusion for a second, "I don't think so."

"Yeah, like isn't there some nerd library down the street, or something else you might be interested in?"

"What are you guys doing?" Alfred asked them, ignoring their suggestion and oblivious to their scorn.

"Oh, nothing. Just some quack stuff."

"Can I play too?"

One of the ducklings placed a wing on Alfred's forehead and pushed him away slightly, "Look, Al. When we say we're doing quack stuff, we mean we're doing _cool _quack stuff."

Alfred smiled, "I know. You guys are always cool!"

The duckling snorted, then shoved him more aggressively, "As in, stuff that doesn't involve _you_."

Alfred looked slightly hurt, "Wait… but I don't understand. Why can't I be involved?"

Another duckling responded, "Because, Alfred, you aren't cool like us."

The first duckling crossed his wings, "Which means you should get lost."

Finally realizing their disdain, Alfred sadly bowed his head and began to walk away, moving slowly toward the "nerd library" they had mentioned.

The other ducklings did little more than snicker, then turned away to continue their game.

As Alfred maintained his slow, sad little waddle, he contemplated his circumstances to himself.

_"Why am I so different than everyone else?"_ He questioned. _"Sure I look a little different, and sometimes I don't really understand stuff that seems to come naturally to them, but I am still a duckling after all. Just like them. So why am I such an outcast? Why am I such a loser?"_

Sighing, he continued walking, eventually reaching the library.

Upon doing so, he found a comfortable chair in the corner and sat down, staring ahead sadly.

_"Maybe reading a book or something would make me feel better…" _

But he didn't feel like reading. He felt like sitting there. Sitting there while staring at people weirdly and giving them the creeps.

That's usually how he spent his afternoons. He didn't mean to make people uncomfortable, but he simply knew nothing of social norms.

* * *

Alfred awoke.

He was still in the chair in the library, but the entire building appeared to be empty and the lights were off.

_"I must have fallen asleep…" _He thought.

Realizing just how empty the place was, he scowled, _"No one bothered to wake me up, or tell me the library was closing. I guess I'm just a ghost to them."_

Irritated, he stood up and stretched his wings, then made his way toward the door.

He found it to be locked.

_"I'm trapped!" _His mind raced frantically.

Of course, he could break through the gaping glass windows near the door with a book, but that would get him into trouble.

_"What do I do instead? Can I contact someone?"_

Looking around, he realized he had no way of accessing any devices with which to communicate. While there was a phone, it was broken, and had been for some time.

It seemed his only recourse would be to wait.

_"Someone will realize I'm gone and come looking for me eventually."_

So, he decided to select a book from a shelf, then take a seat.

The book he chose was titled, _The Power of the Portal_.

_"This seems cool. What's it about?"_

Flipping it open, he found nothing within but a note.

"I am coming to avenge myself." It read.

_"That's really weird…" _

Who was coming to avenge himself?

Suddenly, as if in response to some kind of clichéd cue, the ground began to shake, and the book began to glow.

"What's going on?!" Alfred cried out in fear while backing against the wall.

Soon, the book lifted off the ground and the glow became blinding.

It remained this way for several minutes, with Alfred watching it in disbelief, until it finally collapsed, and the glow dissipated.

Everything grew quiet for a while, and Alfred finally summed up the courage to approach the book again.

_"Please don't do anything weird…" _He begged it silently.

As he reached out his wing to pick it back up, he heard a booming voice outside.

"Listen to me, all of Swiperville!"

Intrigued, he ran to the wide glass windows at the front, where he saw a figure wearing a cape, silhouetted against the moonlight.

A large crowd began gathering to survey the scene, and Alfred found himself in awe.

"I have come to free you from your evil ruler Swiper!"

Unable to endure being trapped in the library any longer, Alfred took a large encyclopedia and flung it at the glass window, shattering it. He then hopped out and joined the crowd at the back, staring up at the incredible sight before him.

Behind the group, a loud rumbling noise was heard, and a ship emerged from the ground.

Everyone gasped and moved away, except for Alfred, who watched in fascination.

A loud speaker then protruded from the ship, and none other than their ruler himself, Swiper, was heard, "You say you are going to release the people of Swiperville from my rule, eh? And who do you think you are exactly?"

In a dramatic fashion, the mysterious figure stepped forward, their frame becoming illuminated by the light of a nearby streetlamp.

"I am Dora Man, the Defender of Evil!" She paused, obviously finding something wrong with what she just said, "Er… the Defender _Against _Evil!"

"Wait… but you're a woman." Alfred shouted in confusion.

Dora Man looked down at him, "My dear citizen, my name must be Dora Man, as I must not betray the laws of the stereotypical superhero!"

Alfred frowned, "But there are stereotypical female superheroes too, like-"

"Silence citizen! Your stupidity has reached its limit! I do not care to carry this discussion any further."

With that, Dora Man turned her attention back to the Dark Ruler Swiper, "I have come to avenge myself of the wrongs you have committed against me, and to free the people of Swiperville!"

Swiper laughed, "Preposterous! I am far too powerful for your pitiful antics, Dora Man!"

Dora Man crossed her arms, "Oh really? Then let's just see…"

Swiper smirked.

"Swiper…" Dora Man said, taking a step forward, "No swiping!"

The dark ruler's grin grew wider, which Alfred could see seemed to confuse Dora Man.

Despite this, she took another step forward, "Swiper…" She waved her arms in a strange pattern, much like a dance, "No swiping!"

Lastly, she threw her hands into the air, as if to call upon some kind of magical power, "Swiper…" She threw them forward, "NO SWIPING!"

Unfortunately, nothing happened, and she remained standing in stark confusion.

"Are you done playing your little games now, Dora Man?" Swiper asked, his grin unable to grow any wider.

"I don't understand…" Dora Man said in shock, "My power… it must have weakened…"

"Oh, don't be fooled, Dora Man." Swiper laughed, "Your power is the same as it has ever been. _I _am the one who has changed…"

Dora Man looked up at Swiper indignantly.

"I have grown tired of being the loser in every match, my friend. Thus I went on a little quest to train my skills as a mastermind. Upon my success, I now know how to perfectly counter your magical phrases."

Dora Man gasped, "It can't be…"

"It is. And with this new found power, I will finally eliminate you, once and for all!"

With that, the ship drew out turret guns, aiming them at Dora Man. Thinking fast, she sprang into the air, narrowly avoiding their blast.

Swiper was clever, however, and quickly changed the target to Alfred.

"Target acquired…" The turret gun said in a delicate-sounding voice, before engaging yet another shot.

Fortunately, Dora Man was faster than the blast, and rescued the duckling before he was blown away.

Setting him down safely on a ledge, she glared back at Swiper, "You have gone too far! Taking aim at an innocent civilian is an atrocity above atrocities!"

Swiper merely laughed, "I am the king of atrocities, my dear hero! I shall commit them at any time I want, for any reason whatsoever! In fact, I even have a billboard filled with printed memories of my prior atrocities. I herald them as absolute achievements!"

Swiper held up a billboard with multiple sheets of paper tacked onto it. One paper read, "The time I stole candy from a baby…", another read, "That time I signed up for an account on Disney without asking for my parent's permission…", and yet another, "That time I went swimming RIGHT after eating…"

Dora Man gasped again, "You monster…"

Swiper tore one sheet of paper off the board, then threw the board itself behind him, "But this, my dear Dora Man, is my absolute favorite atrocity…"

He held up the paper to where she could read it, "That time I stole Dora's backpack…"

Dora Man's eyes widened, then she clenched her fists and flew toward him in anger, "You FIEND!"

A giant flyswat emerged from the ship and swatted Dora Man.

The impact sent her flying from the scene at mach speed.

"Well…" Swiper said in surprise, "That worked a bit better than I expected."

He watched Dora Man while she became a tiny dot in the distance and disappeared from view, then continued his devious scheming.

"Now," Swiper said laughing, "Back to being evil!" He and the ship he was piloting soon disappeared back underground, somehow managing to mend the gap it had opened.

Alfred stood in shock at everything that had happened. He couldn't understand what any of this was about. What, if anything, did it have to do with the book he had opened back in the library? What happened to Dora Man? Why did Swiper want to rule over the humans? But most importantly, how could anyone be capable of the monstrosities he had committed?

The confusion brought him to his knees, and he wept.

Then he realized that duck "knees" were really what humans would refer to as ankles, and they were not supposed to bend the way he was currently bending them.

"AHHHHHHH!" He yelled in intense pain.

Slowly, he managed to unbend his ankles and stand back up, thinking ruefully about his misfortunes.

_"Now I'm going to be sore for weeks!" _He thought miserably, _"And I'm still confused!"_


End file.
